Newly chosen SDSU Delt President Miles Semmler has promised his constituents that he will be a cruel but fair master. While he will rule with an iron-fist his judgement shall be wise.
"For too long we have let our members get away with too much. In my terrible reign, democracy will be a thing of the past. I will hold true to no constitution. My word will be the law of the land and all shall bow before my great power. It's gonna be kickass dude!" said President Pete. "Along with my newly chosen congress I already have a couple laws in mind. Everson will be put on a strict word limit, and Karst will have to wear the hotdog costume every day of his life. All who oppose my power shall be sent to Semmler Farms Labor Camp where your days will be spent checking fence and tending to the pigs." he continued. "I will set up my Oval Office in the upstairs of the 9, since I already spend six days there per week." "We are also looking to abolish all Thursday classes taking place before 2:00 p.m. so that we can make Wednesdays great again. This is my dream, and the dream of the Delt people."
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January 2018
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