School is right around the corner. Soon eager freshman will move into Binneweis and Young and within 24 hours of moving in have the bathrooms reeking of puke and sex. Campus PD will be prowling the area around campus waiting to give out their first minor of the fall.
However, this year will be a bit different than last year, there will be no Jacks Bash, a concert held last year to break in the new stadium. No girls in cowboy boots and guys awkwardly walking with flasks between their legs drunkenly singing along to Luke Bryan and grinding to country music. According to statwizard.org, double the students attended the concert than any football game SDSU had last season. Students are not happy about the lack of celebration.
Harrison Wookey, an elementary Education major and wellness center Guru commented “Last year the bash was on my birthday; I drank a whole bottle of Jose Cuervo before the concert, blacked out before I got there, blew a .23 and got a minor. It was my best birthday yet.”
Jayden Everson (6th man of the year at Aberdeen Roncalli in 2014-2015 and Junior at SDSU studying beers and bros) can’t believe their will be no concert, “What do you mean there’s no Jacks Bash?? I love SDSU but I also love Aberdeen, I won a state title there. If there’s no Jacks bash I think I’m going to transfer to NSU, my friend McNeary goes there” Everson said while searching for RV on Netflix.
On another note, Riley Schmidt had a different opinion, “Jacks Bash can kick rocks. Who gives a flying fuck. I’m just trying to drink some Bud Light Limes.”
Who knows, maybe a surprise Jacks Bash is right around the corner. Worst case scenario there is no Jacks Bash, which is still better than having a T-Pain concert.