If you haven’t caught the hint after this year’s reoccurring “Sebert’s Last [Wednesday/Tailgate/Darty/Formal/Stand]” themed parties, we’ll fill you in: the Wednesday Dude won’t be celebrating any more Wednesdays as an SDSU student.
By some combination of luck, grit, and copious amounts of Adderall, Matt Sebert will be graduating this weekend. In honor of all he’s done by helping found and run SDSU Delt (seriously, this guy slaps) we’ve put together a piece with comments from some of the guys who’ve had the honor of doing college with Sebert. Following that is an interview with the man himself, the former Vice President of SDSU Delt, Mathew “the Wednesday Dude” Sebert. Today is the day 35 dumb and hungover young men have been dreading for over a year. The day Matthew Sebert hangs up the bong and walks off into the very scary sunset. Matt managed to be one of the only SDSU Delt senior to graduate in 4 years, I bet his mom is proud. He also was a 3 time Louisville Chugger champ, the king of Wednesday’s, and one of the founders of the brotherhood. Sebert’s 4 years didn’t go unnoticed by his peers. Ex-President Reilly Ell had some fond memories, “I met him freshman year, he had his door open playing madden, so I walked in and asked if I could play. I told him I hadn’t played before so he picked a bad team. I hustled Sebert whooped his ass by 30 something points. What a sucker. You know what I wont miss about him though? Every morning right after he wakes up he coughs like a freaking chain smoker and wakes me up. Lay off the heaters Matt. Hehe” The most emotional about the topic, Shay Jolley was wiping tears from his eyes when he muttered “If I could tell him one thing before he graduates, it would be how lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard to hard.” Supply and Demand consultant Jtel wasn’t as sad to see Sebert go “fuck Sebert man. I’m still pissed at him for getting us kicked out of that club in Vegas because he spilled someone’s drink at the VIP booth next to us. And last weekend he told a 10 year old to fuck off at the Louisville Chugger, what kind of degenerate is he?” Roy Semmler took it waaaay back in his comments about the wedneday guy, “The first time I ever met Sebert he was paying me and giving me his information for a fake ID. If getting a fake ID with someone isn’t a bonding experience, I don’t know what is.” Sebert was also kind enough to take a few seconds of his busy finals week to answer a few questions and reflect on his educational experience at SDSU. How can we, as the next generation, make you look back on us next year and say “those boys are making me more proud than the Semmler’s dad after he watched them save a baby cow from a flood”? "I’d love to see an actual philanthropy event, another Delt Formal, more theme parties, and to see my boys ballin in the library." What will the name of your first child be if you ever make one? "Kirk Cousins Sebert (assuming the Vikings win Super Bowl 53). This is also regardless of the sex of that child. Kirk Cousins is a gender neutral name." What are you going to miss most about SDSU? "All the convenient parking." What was the weirdest thing you ever did or witnessed in the 9? "The “Black Out” night when Reilly wore a full black morph suit to a deserted 9 and had the big american dance off." If you could only go downtown with one brother for the rest of your life who would it be and why? "J-Tel because if you don’t have fun at the bar you can always just beat him up afterwards." Who is your favorite 6ix roommate? "My favorite roommate is Cody Bussell because of all the dishes he does. Day after day he is in the kitchen scrubbing his fingers to the bone to make sure all of our dishes are clean." Best house party you’ve ever went to? "Sophomore year the Batcave threw a banger. I peed in their freezer, took a bite out of a potato like it was an apple and put a cigarette out on my arm. I’m not proud of those things, but they happened and I have to live with that." What do you want to be remembered for most? The Wednesday guy? 3 time chugger champ? Delt VP? Something else? "For being a bad boy of advertising." You get to sit down with president Barry Dunn for 5 minutes, what would that conversation look like? "A couple of New Years ago Auble stole $10 from a random guy that wanted Josh to buy him a drink. This was happening at about 11:59 mind you. So as the ball was dropping the guy wanted his money back (understandably so) but it was impossible to give it back to him (because we had spent it on shots). The guy got super aggressive about it (understandably) but we weaseled our way out of the situation. He got kicked out of the 9 about 30 seconds into the New Year, and if that didn’t set the tone for 2017 idk what would. Id probably tell Barry that story and then politely ask if he’ll let my friends tailgate next year." Any last words before you go out and do real world things? "Sam Hunt released a new song about a back road or something. Everyone should check it out."
1 Comment
Hora
5/5/2018 10:13:09 am
Legend.
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